Experiencing ADDvantages

For Your Distraction: A Lost Theory

I'm highly distracted today because, well, it's just that kinda day! I've spent the last hour studying this incredible theory of the story that will be revealed on my absolute favorite obsession show, Lost.

Warning, only click through to that link if:

1. You live for Lost.
2. You have an hour to kill. (And I really do mean an hour to kill. If you're procrastinating on something important right now, save this distraction for another day!)
3. You actually want to read what could prove to be a major series spoiler.

If you meet the criteria above, then enjoy!

Have a great weekend, everyone!

Josiah Leming Pulled One Over on American Idol

Okay, this has nothing to do with adult ADD, but I feel like blogging about it.

I don't watch American Idol. Sure I might catch some episodes when it gets down to a few people and everybody starts talking about it. But it's not on my regular viewing schedule of shows I tend to obsess over, like Lost (who the hell sent these new people?), The L-Word (yay Bette and Tina!), and Nip/Tuck (last week's episode when Christian "served up" his manhood was priceless).

I did happen to catch one American Idol show this week in which Josiah Leming performed Mika's "Grace Kelly." I instantly loved that kid. He did a great job with the song, had a nice personality, and he was a cutie to boot.

So I was very surprised today when I can across what seemed like a few hundred headlines about Josiah not making it to the final 24 Idol contestants. I decided to look him up and found his MySpace. It is filled with amazing demos of songs he wrote and performed himself. (I particularly enjoy "To Run.") They're really good...which leads me to believe that this kid is a genius.

I'm thinking he had a plan all along. Wow the judges, get lots of air time, and then purposely cause drama and screw up the final performance knowing you'll be booted. Pretend to cry a little, pretend that you'll have to go back to living in a car, and then shock the world when they Google you, find your MySpace, discover you're actually more talented than anyone on American Idol, and get signed to a major label.

American Idol contracts are notorious for screwing the artist, and so many of their careers never get off the ground, so why bother? Why not use the show to get publicity and then cash in with a better deal? Trust me, this kid knew what he was doing...and I love it!

I hope to hear you on the radio soon, Josiah.

Emotional Sensitivity: Heath Ledger's Death

In response to recent post Mama Drama, Donna wrote:

I have really felt a tremendous sadness over Heath's death. It reminds me of your post about the Lifetime movies. I think it's because some of the things I've read about him reminded me of how I have felt in the past.

I also felt sad about Heath Ledger's passing. Whether his death was intentional or accidental, it's always sad to see someone die before their time...especially when that person has a young child.

As highly sensitive ADDers, we have to remember that while it's okay to feel sad about such things, it's not healthy to get caught up in them.

The media focus on this story last week was over the top. You couldn't escape the coverage without turning off the TV...and that's exactly what many of us had to do. When you're sensitive to emotional stimulus, it's sometimes better to filter it out altogether.

As Donna said, sometimes the sadness is sparked by a sense of empathy that reminds us of our own struggles. This might indicate that there are some past issues that still need to be worked through.
Talking or journaling about your feelings can be really helpful. Psychotherapy is also a good option if the feelings persist.

Did YOU find yourself feeling a little too sad or weepy over Heath Ledger's death? How did you handle it?

Dr. Phil Dismisses ADD

Posted by Sharon Howell, ADD Management Group Coach

I know that most people either love or hate Dr. Phil. I like him very much, except for the fact that he apparently feels that ADD either does not exist or it is no big deal.

I was watching his show last week about a woman who could not stop talking and wanted help. As they showed the clips of her talking to people without taking a breath, she acknowledged that she often had conversations that got so much off track that she would forget the original point. Sitting on the stage she seemed ready to burst, while obviously trying very hard not to ramble. I, as a coach, certainly wondered if she has some level of ADD.

Well, as the conversation continued she stated that she did have ADD and Dr. Phil told her that he did not believe that she did! He completely dismissed that she might benefit by looking into her ADD issues to see if she could find any help for her motor mouth.

I am really concerned when someone with his reputation, but obviously little knowledge of ADD, dismisses it on TV.

I would like to write a letter to Dr. Phil about ADD and his attitude, but I have yet to come up with the words that could actually make him stop and think. This is one area where I feel he does not know what he is talking about. Maybe several letters from concerned viewers would make him see the light and change his tune?!

What do you think about Dr. Phil and his attitude on ADD? Please share your thoughts.

Why Managing Adult ADD Is Like Singing Rock Music

I've been talking a lot about personal themes lately, and the idea of adopting a theme for 2008 instead of making New Year's Resolutions.

For me, this year is about putting myself out there in a really big way. In my personal life, that means stepping up my music game. I'm a singer, and rock-style music is my passion. This is the year that I am finally jumping into working with other musicians, forming a band, writing some original material and--who knows--maybe even playing out!

As I've been working to take my abilities to the next level, I've realized that there are a number of similarities between managing adult ADD and singing rock music. You don't need to be a rock singer to appreciate the similarities.

Whatever it is that really sparks your passion in life, you can find parallels between that passion and managing your ADD. Take my example of singing rock music, and consider this:

You Gotta Practice. Even the most skilled and talented rock singers--the Robert Plants and Ann Wilsons of the world--have to keep their voices well tuned by using them on a regular basis. Without practice, a singer's skills and raw talent won't disappear, but will be a lot harder to access when needed.

Similarly, even the most successful adults with ADD have to practice their ADD management skills. Time management, organization and focus, for example, are learned skills that become rusty when you don't use them on a regular basis.

It's All About Breathing. Your breath supports your voice when you're singing. If you're not breathing regularly and deeply, your body becomes tense. And tense muscles quickly prevent a singer from performing well and sounding good.

When you're managing your ADD, tension is one of your worst enemies. A stressed mind produces a stressed body and vice versa. That stress quickly leads to ADD overwhelm, and it's nearly impossible to manage ADD in the state of overwhelm. One of the best ways to keep stress and tension at bay is to make a point of breathing deeply and regularly.

You Gotta Believe In Yourself. Singing is a performance art. If you're going to be a successful singer, you have to get over your nervousness and just go for it. (This is the stage I'm in right now!) If you believe you can do it, then you will find a way. If you believe you can't do it, then you won't do it.

You also have to believe that you can manage your ADD and take your life to the next level. If you tell yourself that you'll never be organized, then you won't be. If you give up on yourself easily, you'll never allow yourself the opportunity to be successful. When you're ready to tackle a challenge or learn a new skill, the first step is believing that you can do it.

Combining Skill With Personal Style Leads To Success. One of the things I love about rock music is that the emphasis is placed more on emotion than on skill. A rock singer definitely needs to learn about their voice and how to use it properly, but there is a lot of room for personal style. In fact, that personal style is what often draws a person to a particular singer.

This is exactly the way I describe effective ADD management. There are some base level skills and systems to be learned, and the rest is all about personal style. (These are the skills that I discuss in Odd One Out: The Maverick's Guide to Adult ADD.) When you learn to manage your ADD, WHAT works for you is not nearly as important as the fact that it DOES work.

The great thing about drawing these comparisons between two seemingly different subjects is that it allows you the opportunity to simplify the challenges you experience and ground them in something that really excites you. You can continually remind yourself, "Oh yeah, managing my time is just like singing. If I'm stressed out and nervous then I'm not going to do it well! I need to be calm, breathe, and believe that I can handle this to-do list."

I encourage you to take a stab at this exercise and see if you can draw some helpful comparisons between managing your ADD and something else that you're really interested in. Please share your thoughts in the comments!

ADD is the New Rehab: The Britney ADD Scandal Continues

You may have heard (if you even care) that Britney Spears failed a court-ordered drug test. TMZ is now reporting that Britney will "play the ADD card" in court tomorrow and say that she failed the drug test because of Adderall, a prescribed stimulant medication used to treat ADD.

Hmmm...

This is becoming a disturbing trend in Hollywood. All sorts of celebrities, from Britney to Paris, are getting into trouble and blaming it on Attention Deficit Disorder.

And while adults with ADD can be impulsive and sometimes even thrill-seeking, I just don't buy the "ADD made me do it" excuse that so many of them are relying on. If these stars really do have ADD, and really do see doctors and take medication as prescribed, then they should be significantly more in control of themselves and their behavior.

(Besides, I'm inclined to think that Britney is actually bipolar. Now I am not a doctor, I can't make diagnoses, and I have never met Britney Spears. I'm just sayin'... if forced to guess, that's what my money would be on.)

It seems that "I have ADD" is the new "I'm going to rehab." Celebrities believe that it magically absolves them of any wrong doing. Those of us ADDers who live in the real world know it doesn't work that way.

What do you think? Might Britney actually have ADD, or is she just "playing the ADD card?"
                      

Danny Bonaduce Offers Free Life Coaching

Courtesy of PerezHilton, Danny Bonaduce is offering free life coaching.

Take it from a coaching pro: you get what you pay for!

                

Britney Ordered to Get Coaching

Britney Spears and Kevin Federline went to court this week to review the custody arrangement of their two children. As part of the judge's ruling, Britney must attend parenting classes, see a counselor, and meet with a parenting coach once a week.

Can I just say, Wow!?! Talk about great PR! The value of coaching has not only been recognized, but valued, by a the legal system. What a great step forward for coaches and coachees everywhere!

I wish Britney the best of luck and hope she takes advantage of this huge support network to get herself back on track.

Just 3 more days to buy Odd One Out: The Maverick's Guide to Adult ADD at the presale discount! Order now and save a few bucks!

Arrr, It's National AD/HD Awareness Day!

Ahoy, Maties!

Today be National AD/HD Awareness Day. 'tis the day we all do our small part to be educatin' the landlubbers about AD/HD.

Aye, today also be International Talk Like a Pirate Day, and I can't resist havin' a bit o' fun.

Awareness Day and Talk Like a Pirate Day - 'tis the perfect match fer us, me thinks! So go be dispellin' some AD/HD myths with the scallywags while ye be entertainin' 'em with yer pirate speak.

Be proud o' yerselves today, buccanneers! Yo ho ho!

When Is It Okay To Let Yourself Hyper-focus on Something Stupid?

WARNING: DO NOT CLICK THROUGH TO THESE LINKS IF YOU THINK THERE IS ANY POSSIBILITY THAT YOU MIGHT GET SUCKED INTO THEM!

Lately I have been obsessed - and I mean absolutely obsessed - with this particular blind item from this particular gossip blog.

The blind item is about an award-winning old Hollywood actress who was really a man. Some clues have been given and its up to the reader's to figure them out. And let me tell you, I am not the only person obsessed with this shit. A Friday night post on this item already has 900+ comments. Do all these people have ADD, too?

I have to admit, I haven't had a bout of hyper-focus like this in a very long time. I love the challenge of having this very interesting puzzle to figure out. I love seeing what other people think and what they have found, too. I spent hours on this crap Friday evening and all weekend I sneaked over to the computer for updates whenever I could.

Now, however, it's Monday and I have a lot of work do to this week. I can't afford to spend time screwing around on gossip blogs.

When I have some downtime and nothing better to do, who cares if I get sucked in? During the week, however, I have to be careful to just not go there. I know the danger of getting sucked into the quicksand, and I can't go anywhere near it.

So my answer to the title question of When Is It Okay To Let Yourself Hyperfocus on Something Stupid? is, quite simply: when it doesn't interfere with the rest of your life.

What stupid or insignificant things do you get stuck hyper-focusing on?